5 Reasons to Start a New Hobby While Your Spouse Is Gone


As a military spouse, your service member is likely away for periods of time. Whether it’s months or weeks, this time can leave you feeling lonely. It can likely make you feel all kinds of things. Sad, annoyed, frustrated, stressed. So… why not pick up a new hobby?

I know I know. In your head, you’re probably listing the popular reasons not to do this. 

Let’s tackle them together, shall we? 

  • I don’t have time. 
  • I don’t have energy. 
  • I don’t have the patience. 
  • I’m already picking up extra work around the house while my spouse is away. 

I hear you—I do. 

If you truly don’t think you have the time, energy, and brain space to start something new while your spouse is away… don’t! 

You know yourself and your schedule. You know your capacity for new things. Especially while you’re solo-parenting or just soloing for a while. And that is completely okay! So, while your spouse is away, focus on maintaining your routine. Don’t start anything new. Coast. Survival mode only. 

But just for a second, allow me to try to convince you why you should start a new hobby while your spouse is gone.

So without further ado, here are 5 reasons you should start a new hobby while your spouse is gone. young woman reading

1. A new hobby keeps you busy. 

I know, obvious. But a new hobby keeps your whole self busy—both brain and body. If you’re throwing all your mental energy into learning something new or working towards something, you’ll likely worry less about your partner and the fact that they’re away. 

2. A new hobby allows you to work toward a goal. 

One of the best ways to stay busy and make time feel like it’s not ticking backward is to work towards a goal. Whether your goal is a large one or a few more manageable ones, is up to you. 

But set a goal! 

Here are some goal-oriented ideas you might try for your new hobby:

  • Complete an end product by the time your spouse comes home. For example, sew a blanket. Make a beautiful cake. Run a mile without stopping. 
  • Have a distinct before/after vision. 
  • Create something tangible. 
  • Dedicate a certain amount of time/hours to your new hobby. Use a tracker. Check off boxes or days. It adds up! 

3. A new hobby gives you a conversation starter.

Use your new hobby to break the ice. Either with other people around you or with your spouse. A new hobby can gift you with an easy conversation starter. When our spouses are gone, many people will often ask, “What are you doing?” or “How are you doing?” 

It can get overwhelming to explain the complex feelings and emotions we go through when missing a partner. Having something easy and fun to talk about when others (or our spouse!) ask these kind, but dreaded questions gives a great conversation starter. 

Instead of focusing on how you’re coping solo, you can share the new and fun things you’re learning. 

4. A new hobby helps you feel accomplished when things might be…hitting the fan elsewhere

Your hobby just might be the thing keeping you from losing your mind while your spouse is gone! Having something productive to put your time and energy into might turn out to be your saving grace. 

Instead of scrolling social media or spiraling late at night missing your husband, maybe you spend time in the kitchen learning a new skill. Rather than puttering around your house missing routines you share with your spouse, maybe you sit on the couch and crochet a blanket you hope is done by the time they come home. The world where our spouse is gone feels lonely and let’s be real, usually chaotic. I mean… have you met Murphy

Picking up a new hobby might be the great escape we’re looking for. 

5. A new hobby can be customizable.

This time (and hobby) is completely customizable for whatever you want it to look like. 

Maybe your new hobby looks more like a project or goal. Maybe it involves a transformation, or it’s much smaller than that. You’re not a fitness girly and you don’t want your new hobby to be workout-related. That’s okay! Find what works for you. Find something you like or want to focus on and do it! But don’t let “what you usually do” stop you from trying something new. 

Instead of focusing on the end goal, maybe you want to chip away at a project or make something large you’re working on more “bite-sized.” Consider your goal. woman doing exercise at home

Think big-picture! 

Depending on how long you have, how much brain space and time you can do it in, make it manageable.   

Need some hobby ideas? I’ve got you! (Or Pinterest is a great resource!)

  • Sewing/Crochet
  • Skateboarding/roller skating/ice skating
  • Reading 
  • Painting
  • Sourdough bread/baking/cookie decorating
  • Scrapbooking
  • Photography
  • Dancing
  • Gardening
  • Yoga/Crossfit 


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