It’s none of our business what other people think about us.
We’ve heard it all before. We know we shouldn’t care what others think, and yet, we still do and want to know what they think about us.
Do they like us? Do they support the big and little decisions we make?
“If my kid doesn’t behave in this store, everyone is going to think I’m a bad parent!”
“I don’t even like this new thing everyone is crazy about but I want to be accepted.”
The struggle is real!
But what if we changed our perspective?
It’s none of our business what other people think about us.
What if, instead of even considering what people say about us as fact, we lived our lives like it wasn’t our business what other people think about us.
I’m not saying be careless, cruel, and flippant with your actions, choices, and words. I’m saying, instead of internalizing the word of the world, we simply stop making decisions based upon what others may think of us.
Easier said than done, right?
I spent my 20s caring deeply about what others thought of me. As a military spouse, I felt like my entire identity was caught up in that of my spouse’s career.
Was I just a dependent? Was I going to have a career? Hey, I’m important too!
I wanted my parents to be proud of me (spoiler alert: they already were), I wanted to prove myself, and I wanted people to think of me as more than *insert rank* Lane’s spouse. I just wanted to be recognized for my accomplishments too.
The truth is that it didn’t matter what I did. People were going to talk and think what they wanted.
It didn’t keep me from trying though. I threw myself into my career, into volunteering, and then into motherhood. I was set out to be the best of everything. Picture perfect life with the greatest career, top-notch volunteer position, and mom of the year.
All I managed to accomplish was miserable success. Yes, I was great and I had it all, and I was miserable.
This whole “worrying what other people thought” issue was holding me back. It wasn’t until we were post-2020 that I realized the extent of how I made it my business what others thought about me.
Cue what I like to call the great exodus of my 30s. Much to the shock of everyone who knows me, I quit my job. Traded my sporty little car in for a “mom-mobile.” I stepped away from everything I had built around myself to make me seem important.
And instead, I chose joy.
I chose to become a stay-at-home mom, which is a lot more fun than people think. I started writing and actually sharing my work, and picked up a book for the first time in years (and I’ve been devouring them ever since). It took more effort than I’d like to admit, but when I stopped caring about what society thought about me, it turned out that life can be pretty great.
It’s none of our business what other people think about us.
When we worry about what others think about us, we let them steal our joy.
The world will convince you that whatever path you have set out in life, it’s not enough.
The way you parent, how you spend your time in a career outside the house or investing in your own home-life, how you choose to vacation, when you choose to listen to Christmas music, the books you read, how or where you listen to your favorite podcasts; there will always be someone to judge you or to join you.
And whenever I get the overwhelming feeling to start worrying about what people may think about me, I simply remind myself…
It’s above my pay grade.
Classified.
Data unavailable.
It’s simply none of my business what other people think about me!
