The hustle and bustle of the holidays are behind us, New Year’s resolutions have been made (and perhaps, already broken), we have settled into a new year and our winter days are numbered. Around February and March, many of us start wishing the cold winter days away and are waiting for spring with open arms. We start to search for “signs of life”: flowers blooming, warmer temperatures, sunshine. We begin to dream about the summer days ahead and all the outdoor adventures to come. It can be easy, at the end of winter, to impatiently wish for the seasons to change.
But maybe, you are feeling in dire need of a new life season. Perhaps you are feeling stuck in a rut, or you are in a particularly hard period of motherhood, or marriage. The new year has not started the way you would have hoped, and it feels like you are stomaching one hit after another. You may feel hopeless- that things are ever going to look differently than they do today. Whatever situation you may find yourself in this winter, just know, spring is coming.
One of the (many) tricky things about military life, is that it naturally lends itself to being seasonal. Some assignments are harder than others, some locations include deployments, or welcoming new babies, or sending a high schooler away to college. You may find an amazing group of friends at one duty station and feel like you have a true tribe, only to feel immense loneliness at another duty station. Moving every few years can naturally lead to feeling like each duty station is its own little chapter of your life, or a different season altogether.
When you find yourself stuck in a season of life that is difficult, it can be so easy to feel defeated and wish the season away. I can easily recall times where I have counted the number of weeks or months until we were moving, ready for a fresh start at a new location. Turns out, not every problem can be solved by a new assignment or duty location. Learning to lean in to the difficult seasons of life is something I have intentionally worked on doing over the past several years. And let me be clear, leaning in to hard things is not easy or enjoyable – and while I am not always good at it, I am able to look back and appreciate how much I have been through.
You have probably heard some version of the phrase, “nothing ever stays the same – good or bad”. I try to put that reminder at the forefront of my mind when dealing with a tough season. I know from life experience, that no matter how good or bad something is right now, it is temporary. If you find yourself struggling this winter, or disappointed by how this new year has begun, you are not alone. The season you find yourself in right now is not forever and change will inevitably come.
While you wait for this season to pass, be gentle with yourself. Take time daily to slow down, take in the good that is around you. Lean in to your support group and accept the help while you do what you need to do to get through this tough time. It really is okay if you do not have it all together, or if you feel completely exhausted with all of life’s demands. Ask for a hug. Take a nap. Walk outside. Cry. Keep pressing forward. You really are doing so, so well friend, and just remember, spring is coming.
